My new cross has been lying here
for ten days now.
I've been walking around it,
kicking it, cursing it,
and wishing I had a magic wand
to make it disappear.
It has "illness" written on it.
Long term stuff.
I had plans and dreams
and was anxious to get started.
This crude heavy thing
threw a monkey wrench into everything.
"Unless you take up your cross
and follow Me..."
Come on, Lord, I'd be a so much better
follower if I didn't have to lug
this heavy thing with me.
It's going to slow me down,
I'll get so tired,
I won't be any good on the job.
"Unless you take up your cross
and follow..."
Really?
I walk around it once more,
give it another kick,
shed another tear.
God - please - I hate this thing!
"Unless you take up your..."
Allright.
I gingerly bend down and pick it up
and lift it to my shoulders.
Hmmm.
It feels sort of like a yoke.
Does this have something to do with
"Take my yoke upon you and learn of me?"
Well, my speed will certainly be different
and my life style.
Maybe I'll relax without feeling guilty.
(Relax with this heavy weight on my shoulders?)
I'll lounge and read and read.
Did He say, "Learn of Me?"
Yes, of course,
there's always so much to learn
and maybe some of it can only sink in
through this particular obstruction.
Hmmm.
I feel sort of light somehow.
Strange...
'Cause the thing looked so heavy.
...
I wrote this piece in '89 when I was struggling
to accept an Epstein Barr diagnosis.
Someone asked me to post it here as it may be
an encouragement when faced with a cancer diagnosis.
I read a fantastic book this week! Have you
heard of Cancer and the Lord's Prayer by
Greg Anderson? I had heard him on 100 Huntley and
bought the book at Chapters.
He had lung cancer and was given 30 days to live
22 yrs. ago! He now has a ministry among millions of
cancer patients. His story is very encouraging.
I'm rereading the book! He challenges
us to pray the Lord's Prayer every day for 40 days
meditating on the deeper meaning of the words which
he explains.
Visit his site at:
www.CancerRecovery.org and...
Be encouraged!
Angie
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